Good people of Blogville! I haff  come o! I have finished fasting, and although I look like a broomstick, I’m ready to start my 30-day blogging challenge.  Let the blogging begin! I’m not sure if people will read my blog sef, this one that na Twitter controversies everybody dey blog about… Issorai… *wipes tears*….  Any which how sha, lemme sha post my thing….

Day 1’s Post is just to give a summary of my boring life story… From the moment I cried for the first time to the moment I started typing this… Here goes…

QUESTION: Discuss extensively the life and times of the Writer (40 marks)

ANSWER:

My full name is Oluwamayowa Oluwaseyi Temitope Abdulkareem George. I was born on January 20, 1992 (If anybody should call me a small boy ehn….).  I was born into a family of 7. I’m the last child of the pack and the 2nd boy.

I started schooling very early, at the age of 1. I don’t think there were stuffs like daycare and kindergarten back then, so with two working parents and all my siblings going to school, I was dumped into the Nursery 1 class at Command Children’s School Ikeja to sit down and mope at the other “freshers”. The class teacher, noticing that I was more intelligent than most of the other toddlers (if anybody should yimu ehn…) brought this fact to my parents’ knowledge and advised them to enroll me then. School fees then was crazy cheap (It was N1,050 for civilian students) so  Momsie had no qualms and thus my abnormally fast education began.

I really don’t have much of a recollection of Primary school, except for the fact I was the best student in my set virtually throughout primary school….*sips Hi-Malt*… I was beaten to the prize in Primary 4 though, one of the saddest years in my life. What made it so sad was that I was beaten by a girl. I felt really bad that someone broke my perfect record. Not just anyone, but a girl! I swear if I see that girl for road I go pour am hot water…

After primary school, I carried my wahala to Federal Government College Lagos, where I spent the most horrible 6 years of my life. I remember when I got home after my first mid-term,  and I told Momsie I would rather hawk pure-water than go back to that school…. It was that terrible… There a lot of details about that school and my life back there that I’ve tried to erase from my memory… Memories so dreadful I feel like committing suicide…. July 9, 2007 (the day I finished) will always be one of the most wonderful days in my life.

The only positive thing that happened to me in secondary school was my conversion to Islam. I was exposed to both religions from birth, my dad being a Pastor and momsie a Muslim… I still wonder how they got married sef…  Anyways, I experienced both, and in my SS1 finally decided to become a Muslim… Still the best decision I’ve ever made.

Anyways, I continued with my life and got admission into University of Ilorin to study Medicine. I was just 15 then, and in the euphoria of being an undergraduate at that age, I totally neglected my studies…  And I got dumped out Medicine and was sent to study Human Anatomy… What pissed me off the most was that, if I had spent that year partying like mad and having wild orgies and getting high every time, the “eviction” might have been worth it. Sadly, the cause of my downfall was video games. Sounds crazy, right? I remember spending N3,000 at a gaming centre once… Yes, it was that bad…. My video game addiction reduced drastically, though I will still beat iyalaya anybody that will try me in PES 2011… Moving on…

2008-2011 was spent trying to complete one of the hardest tasks ever: Graduating with a degree from University of Ilorin.  I swear I can never allow any of my family members go to that school. For a University which has its Social Life Ratings in the negative, one would think the students would all be graduating with First Class degrees. Bullshit. There has been only 1 First Class student in Human Anatomy since 1975. In Physiology, none. I remember an assignment once when I scored 4.5 out of 20 and I heaved a sigh of relief. Aunty Kemi, wherever you dey, God dey look you o… Late last month, my task was completed. The graduation list for the 2010/2011 session was released and thanks to God, yours truly was listed

During that period also, my addiction to music sky-rocketed and spawned my introduction into the Entertainment sector. I began to listening to anything music (even Chinese hip-hop… that ish was horrible) and even began to write lyrics. I got into Events Managing and PR, thanks to people like Sola Rahman, Taqwa Ghazal and Wunmi Olowofeso, organizing shows like Unilorin’s 1st Inter-Faculty dance competition and Shoe Soiree.  I enjoyed it so I moved in big, working for Streets Legend Entertainment, and organizing album tours and listening parties for Ruggedman, Jahbless, Isolate, The Alapomeji Crew (9ice, Ajayi Brovas, Seriki) amongst others.

Aaah…. Yep that’s about it…  I’ve successfully managed to crop 19 years in 900 words… ‘Tis not easy… Nothing much has happened in my life since graduation, just been lying around the house looking for different ways to kill boredom… Life as a jobless graduate is fucked… Can’t wait to go for my NYSC in Borno and hook up with my Boko Haram peeps 😀

See y’all tomorrow!

Advertisements