started from the bottom, now we're here

started from the bottom, now we’re here

Its a hot Thursday here in Port Harcourt, a perfect weather to learn a thing or two about boys who behave like female dogs. We have here, one of the crazy boys of Yorubaland, @__TIFE to do justice to this topic

Morning. Afternoon. Night.
I’m here to give you a few tips on how to recognise a bitch nigga. These people are trying to hide who they are. But we have identified them. First, I will thank Uncle Wana for letting me use his popular blog as a medium to preach this gospel to you people, our followers. And Uncle Niro, patron saint of the friendzone.

Here goes something about everything. If your boyfriend is in any of these categories, well. If you are, well.

1) IF HE IS AN arsenal fan: wait, why are you staring? 8 years don waka dem still dey trophyless, wenger still dey coach them. Tell me, how can a member of the male specie support a fruitless club for this long. It’s easy to say Arsenal is female and after 8 years of marriage she decided to be barren. What do you expect, she likes taking it in the “Arse”. Always anal. A guy that supports this excuse of a club is gradually turning into a female. Show us your pussy.

But arsenal won yesterday… 😦

2) (S)HE WHO CASTS: Basically. He is now a girl. Professional fuck boy. Chronic snitch. Unrepentant bitch. Why you will go around telling stories about a fellow nigga makes you a bitch. I mean close your legs, your pant is showing. Worse is when he writes it on his TL or employ it in a twitfight. We understand you are on your period the cramps are a bitch, get a hot water bottle.

3) THINKS TWILIGHT AND GLEE IS THE SHIT: I’m not one to say that what you watch should define you. But Glee and Twilight, that’s a no no. I got Glee like 2 years ago. After the first five minutes, my mom said “this series is boring, remove it” she’s fifty. Why do you watch it? I don’t woman. Are you out of tampons?

But Puck is an ubermale 😦

4) DOES NOT WATCH SOCCER: “men who do not watch soccer have a female alter ego” – Oscar Wilde. I am not saying much on this. My nigga Oscar said it all.

5) You ever been slandered on Twitter? Or Tensioned? No? Good. Well I have. And I take the Jabs like Mohammed Ali’s punching bag. Then I turned the table on another nigga nigga. And I got blocked. What do you judges think? What? He is gay? I thought as much. Let’s pray for him.

6) HE WHO BITCHES ABOUT BEEN BLOCKED: You see only girls complain. Nag. Whine. And bitch about. So when a dude starts tweeting through the pain after he has been blocked. Just know it’s PMS. Pray for him.

Encore:

7) He doesn’t “humbly” solicit to get in the sheets. Nah, that BA behavior.

8) If he hasn’t subscribed to Wana’s playbook. Proper bitch ass behavior.

9) If he thinks its cool to drink coke when every one else is drinking water •__•. That right there is proper BA behavior.

That’s it for today. Fish out the bitch niggas. Tie them to a stake. Pray for them. Hallelujah.

Olajuwon Jeremy Targert

evolnerd@gmail.com

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Also feel free to add, “If he uses the phrase, Of Life”, if he thinks Fifa 13 is better than PES, if he thinks “those pink shirts are cute” ati bebelo.

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